By Amanda Tsitsi

There are many things which women can do and for men they turn out to be a struggle. This does not mean women are better than men, it just simply means we are different. Men are great and so are women – lets shy away from thinking one side of the coin should only be the better one. We are all unique, lets focus on and embrace our uniqueness.

In this season of my life I have learnt many things, one of the main ones being saying what I really mean and doing what I really want – without second guessing. I used to be afraid of expressing myself due to fear of judgement. So let me remind you too that your voice matters and it is powerful. What you have to offer the world is needed. You are the missing piece of the puzzle.

For many years I tried to conform and be like others, to be safe, to be liked and to silence my voice at every moment. My mind would be clouded by “what ifs”. What if what I thought made me look or sound like this? What if I get judged and I am never confronted. What if my words are misrepresented? Overthinking became my best friend. I was never more stifled in my life, when the unexpected took place. The people I wanted to be liked and or accepted by did not like me anyway – no matter how hard I tried to live a life which pleased them, they were never impressed. In turn I was hurt which could have led to bitterness. This came with my wake up call. I realized that everyone is focused on their own life and their own journey. If they think of you, it’s only for 5% of their time, and you’re amongst the many other things and people that crossed their mind. I then said to myself, “It’s time to focus and stay in your lane, build your own story, think clearly about where and who you want to be and head in that direction girl.”

Let’s drink to the lessons I’ve learnt:

Hold on to your virtue and your standards.

Work and hustle

Make a little money of your own. Find ways to secure the bag. Now in this century, money is easy to make. Morally. People have made money selling items online, exporting locally made products and making content for blogs, Instagram and YouTube. Find your purpose, when I look at  Madam Boss, MaiTT, Patricia Bright – they are in the social circles and leaving their mark. If you learn how to add value to people’s lives, you can be paid for it.

Build a real relationship with God.

There is a God who created you and loves you exactly as you are. He is the only one who will never leave you nor forsake you, His intentions for you are good. If you ask Him for anything, He will do it for you as long as you put Him first in your life.

 Learn to say no.

This word is so powerful, and you have every right to use it whenever you want to, no explanations and no questions asked.

On a lighter note have 2 or 3 meals that you can cook your face off. For me it’s Fried rice, carbonara and sadza nemuriwo. These 3 are also my absolute favourite meals.

Develop a healthy self-esteem and learn to love yourself. Look your best, treat yourself, smile and wink when you look at yourself in the mirror.

Be focused on learning.

Read and watch material that teaches you about saving, working, faith, family matters and so on. Do not limit yourself.

Journal.

Find healthy ways to express yourself.  Write or record your thoughts and feelings in some way. Even if you don’t share them, it’s the acknowledgment and validation of your inner feelings that matters.

Be a good friend and have good friends.

A good friend is trustworthy and builds you up, your conversations elevate you and teach you how to become the best version of yourself. It’s okay to let some friends go and find new ones, even if you just have one, and that friend is gold, then you have more than enough.

You don’t have very long on this earth, but while you’re here think about the legacy you want to leave. Find out and discover what you want to be known for and live up to that every single day!

Blessings!

@amandatsi